3. It's Not What You Know, It's Who You Know
I have so many experiences that prove this quote true and I’ll share a couple. To start off with my personal life, for many years I was pretty faithless. Not because I was raised without faith, I was raised around religion, but because the primary person I was around for over a decade had no faith or hope. I have put myself in higher places due to my education and experiences, but more so because of the people I know. The reason I bring up the personal experience is that we have to be very careful of who we have in our inner circle and who has access to us everyday because those are the voices we hear most frequently and they become our inner voice. If those people are not already our parents, they replace our parents’ voices. It’s really important that the people you surround yourself with are positive, good energy, good vibes, and supportive. They don’t always have to agree with you, but they understand you. They don’t just know you, they understand you. My personal experience with somebody who is faithless and hopeless is that that person’s energy, way of thinking, and way of looking at the world really rubs off on you. Even if you disagree, even if you know that you think and feel differently, you can’t help but adopt some of those feelings, thoughts, and words if that’s what you hear everyday. That really affected the way I thought of my education and how I thought of myself in the working world as a woman. I graduated at 29 with my Bachelors; it took quite a while. When I graduated with my Bachelors, it led me to classroom teaching since I majored in Education. Classroom teaching was not for me. It actually made me question public education completely. I subbed and dabbled in a lot of different teaching positions before deciding to abandon tradition teaching altogether. I was completely lost in this moment. I didn’t know what I had spent so many years in college for. The questioning that was going on around me from society and people close to me was really getting to me as far as what I was doing and what I was expected to do. I decided to make a list of things I was interested in doing when I was sure of myself, because in this moment I was completely lost. I thought, well, I was so sure of myself and so confident when I was a teenager (in comparison to when I was almost 30). I made a list of everything from the type of music I listened to, the type of art I liked, and what I liked to do for fun. A lot of it revolved around writing, expression, and releasing the writing. At the time, I was spending a lot of time in the car and happened to learn of City Bureau, a journalism lab on the south side of Chicago which led me to a journalism fellowship. This 13-week experience was wonderful and really opened my eyes to the type of writing that is out there. Not just journalism, but the process of writing, the process of collecting information, and stories; the importance of stories. The importance of getting to know people, not just the ones you’re interviewing, but the people you work with. I learned that everyone becomes a resource. Not just for you to use, but for you to take a long with you on your journey. At the end of this fellowship, I reached out to one of the co-founders about where I could find a version of this experience with youth. Luckily, there was an application open for a students voice and activism fellowship and she knew the program coordinator personally and referred me to her. I applied, got interviewed by youth, which is very intimidating , and got the position as the Media Literacy Instructor. Even though this experience was only 8 weeks, It really changed what I wanted to do with my life. It really opened my eyes as to who I want to be around, what I want to do specifically with youth, and the fact that I didn’t want to teach. I wanted to continuously learn, and I wanted to be in a space of equity with youth where we are learning together, not where I am the holder all knowledge. The program coordinator eventually left her position and referred me to replace her. I applied and interviewed again with the youth and because they knew me personally, because we built this relationship, because people are resources, I got the position as program coordinator. I never would have imagined was possible months after deciding to leave teaching altogether, even though this wasn’t a traditional teaching position. My moral of the story is not only it’s not what you know, it’s who you know, but to see value in the people who are part of your story. See the value in their conversation, their experiences, and the reason they want to be in contact with you. I don’t think we should underestimate at all the power of knowing people and them knowing us. I believe this is sacred. I encourage everyone to go out, make connections, make yourself known, you will not be forgotten. Allow people to take you to your next step. We have to help with this, by asking, just as I did at the end of the journalism fellowship. Make connections, you are one of those connections people should know.
What to Do When You Feel Lost: How to Rekindle Your Adolescence
Reflect on a time when you pursued creativity, took risks, and discovered your identity
Write a list of things you enjoyed doing during that time and things you knew about yourself
Journal or discuss with someone what you needed as a young person
Become the person you needed, think about how you can show up for the younger you and commit to 3 values or actions
Focus on 1-3 things from your list in #2 and pursue those things NOW
